Dear Corporate E-mail Users...
I'm on call 24 hours a day 7 days a week to ensure that your BUSINESS mail makes it through to you. I do my best to protect you from spam and porn but there are 20,000 spammers out there and only one of me. I drop 95% of everything that tries to make it to you and yet you still bitch and moan if a piece of spam or two makes it through. Yes I know you're an e-mail expert and I appreciate such helpful suggestions from the user community but I CAN'T block the word "johnson" just because you aren't interested in enlarging yours, it happens to be a last name.
And I am so fucking tired of these stupid bitches that get a little piece of porn spam and start fanning themselves as though they are some kind of southern lady. Then I have to apologize that my e-mail system allowed this shit through to lil' miss innocent. Listen Pollyana, this wasn't midget clown porn, barnyard porn, bukaki or dirty sanchez lessons. Don't preach to me about how you expect only business mail to make it through my system when I can see what you have been sending for the last 30 days. (BTW, Is it really necessary to use your sig line when you use company e-mail to set up your lunch time quickie?)
Oh and one last thing, I don't give a fuck if little johnny graduated at the top of his class and I doubt the 5,000 other people you sent your unzipped 15MB graduation pictures to care either. I DO know that the rest of the company will care when you bog down the whole system and cause everyones e-mail to deliver 30 seconds later than it normally would. I will be fielding calls about that for a week, thanks.
I'm on call 24 hours a day 7 days a week to ensure that your BUSINESS mail makes it through to you. I do my best to protect you from spam and porn but there are 20,000 spammers out there and only one of me. I drop 95% of everything that tries to make it to you and yet you still bitch and moan if a piece of spam or two makes it through. Yes I know you're an e-mail expert and I appreciate such helpful suggestions from the user community but I CAN'T block the word "johnson" just because you aren't interested in enlarging yours, it happens to be a last name.
And I am so fucking tired of these stupid bitches that get a little piece of porn spam and start fanning themselves as though they are some kind of southern lady. Then I have to apologize that my e-mail system allowed this shit through to lil' miss innocent. Listen Pollyana, this wasn't midget clown porn, barnyard porn, bukaki or dirty sanchez lessons. Don't preach to me about how you expect only business mail to make it through my system when I can see what you have been sending for the last 30 days. (BTW, Is it really necessary to use your sig line when you use company e-mail to set up your lunch time quickie?)
Oh and one last thing, I don't give a fuck if little johnny graduated at the top of his class and I doubt the 5,000 other people you sent your unzipped 15MB graduation pictures to care either. I DO know that the rest of the company will care when you bog down the whole system and cause everyones e-mail to deliver 30 seconds later than it normally would. I will be fielding calls about that for a week, thanks.
1 comment:
I am confused about this posting, are you complaining about doing your job? People should be able to use email to set up their lunch time quickies. Haven't you heard, the government is monitoring all of your telephone calls.
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